AJ photos from Jennie Jones

Jennie and Joan were great friends from early days in school. Here are some photos she just sent to me.

Dylan Thomas Poem: Do Not Go Gentle into That Good Night

Do Not Go Gentle into That Good Night

Do not go gentle into that good night,

Old age should burn and rage at close of day;

Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,

Because their words had forked no lightning they

Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright

Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,

Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,

and learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,

Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight

Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,

Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on the sad height,

Curse, bless me now with your fierce tears, I pray.

Do not go gentle into that good night.

Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

to AJ from Carolyn L. Bates

AJ

. ..You have been in my life for so long....

I remember being so envious of you, so very beautiful, and marring my favorite uncle. Your wedding was like a fairy tale wedding. Do you remember not having a white cloth to put down the aisle so you could walk on it? My father went out to find one. He saw one being used, and after they were finished, he flipped it over, rolled it up, and brought it back to your church. I believe this held up the wedding for a long time!

My favorite story about you and UB was about the shower that hung from the ceiling in your apartment in Paris. And the time that the drain did not work, and one of you was using the shower watching the water slowly rise inside the cylinder of plastic.

When you and UB came back from Europe , I came over so many times while I was in Cambridge. One time I had a bit of wine to drink, along with a many course dinner for Christmas, including a tapioca pudding that took a week to make, as the pearls had to soak for that long! Going home, I had no clue that my emergency brake was on the whole time! I ruined it permanently! Oh my.

One time upon arriving at your house, you came running out and said, " Don't you dare step on that gold plated lawn. That was going to be my mink coat!! " UB had just had someone roll on an entirely new lawn that day - I loved that you could be funny about it, knowing also that you would have LOVED that mink coat.... .

I had no idea how to cook. My first lesson from you was for chicken stew a la Julia Childs. There were three pages on how to cut up the mushrooms. While I attempted to stretch my 2 pot cooking set into the 5 needed for this stew, you encouraged me over the phone.

And the grandest of all birthdays, you put together so perfectly.

For three days you had UB totally happy, surprised, and laughing every minute, for his 80th. Unexpected guests were showing up, the parties that flowed together one day to the next, and the food, was spectacular.

So many great times...so many memories...I love you AJ.

Carolyn March 26, 2010

PS: AJ you have certainly been a special part of both our lives....a model of how to do things, and perhaps how not to, but always a powerful presence. From Cindy and Carolyn

To AJ from Cindy Koster

AJ,

I am asking C to read this to you, as my farewell....from the time I met you as UB's fiancé, you carved out a place in my heart and my head. You were so elegant, so sophisticated, so beautiful. I talked about being in your wedding for months before, and months after the event, and wore the gold linen shoes to school for the next year, hiding them away in the bushes in front of the house as they were "good" shoes and not allowed for school.

Over the years, you maintained this impression, elegance, sophistication, and beauty, and added to it in so many ways. I saw your humor, your kindness, your sagacity, and sometimes, your sarcasm (the sisters calling your husband "Bobby" long after he left short pants), all of which became "AJ", the fantastic aunt I had living in Lexington. This impression of you, my experiences with you, will always remain in my heart. Here is a kiss.....an embrace.

Cindy

March 26, 2010

Memories and Photos

I first met Aunt Joanie just before she married my favorite Uncle, Bob. My uncle was but 16 years older than I, and I had a HUGE crush on him. I was furious that he was getting married!! (I think my sister, Cindy, felt the same way.) AJ was so beautiful.

At their wedding, my father was the hero of the day, as he found a replacement for the missing white carpet AJ needed to properly walk down the aisle. My sister got to be a flower girl with my cousin, Bug Riesmeyer (Sutton). Having all the guests sign the guest book was my job. My brother, Stewart, and Bug's brother, Duncan, raced each other to see who could eat more carrots, Stewart, or olives, Duncan, at the reception. I believe both were over 200 each when they both raced to the bathroom! AJ's best friend Jennie Jones was the maid of honor.

I am going to put in wedding photos first. And then I will put in various photos of AJ before we met her, including photos of her parents and sister, Marguerite. Later I will add photos of her, my uncle and all of their children, grand children, and friends.

I do hope that AJ's friends and family will email me at:

cbates@carolynbates.com (802-862-5386)

and include memories and photos (please send HUGE jpg files), so that I may add these to this blog as well as put them in the Memorial Service, and in a scrapbook that my mom (Bob's sister, Marie Louise) and my sister (Cindy Bates Koster) and I are assembling as a gift to Bob. Apparently I can get the blog printed into a book as well, for anyone who wants a copy.

When I get the official Memorial for Joan Gartside, I will post that here. I have seen the basic plan that Uncle Bob has put together. It will be a ten star event, not to be missed, with songs, poems, memories, and a piano solo. Sunday May 30, 2010.